Day 4
April 14, 2010 - 8:24 pm

I thought about you today more than usual I suppose. You took up my mind all day. Life is ok, I'm newly committed to going back to life as usual while you are away, and I feel good with that decision. Also, I am keeping my promise of trying to cook more at home, today I made Vegan Creamy Carrot Curry with Coconut Soup. It was terrible....like pureed carrots..yuk! but on the upside Barb thought it was high class so I'll give it to her. I had a really good ride today then it started to hail sideways and hit us in the arena so we headed in. Writing to you helps me, even though you'll never read these entries...or any other, privacy and all that. It feels weird to write, I've been away for awhile and I'm not as depressed as I used to be, which makes me wonder if I'd lost my edge.....maybe not, maybe so. I'm also a lot happier these days...with medication of course. I could skip some and see where my writing goes....that would be a bad idea..stoner..sheesh. True, it would be. I think I'll just keep writing and waiting for something that I'll feel satisfied with, until then, these one sided converstaions will continue. I love you baby, so, so much. You always say that you love me more than I'll ever know, but, you are the only person withwhom I know I want to be with......ever. I miss you...

yesterday - tomorrow